A LOT can happen in a decade.
Babies are born, people pass away..Couples get married..some get divorced.
You get where I am going here..
ANYWAY, 10 years ago I graduated high school. That's right.. HIGH SCHOOL. Insert whatever lame joke, opinion, whatever you want to here.
So, the kids who plan things.. you know the ones..planned a shindig this weekend so we can all get together and reminisce.
I have a fair amount of good memories when it comes to high school and also a fair amount of BAD ones. What can I say? Kids are/were/will always be MEAN.. down right HATEFUL. Am I holding a grudge? Maybe. Is high school over? Yes. Thank Goodness!
I had lunch with one of my best friends today, sadly she is not going to the reunion. I wish she was.. mainly because she is one of the good things I hold on to about ol'BHS. Plus, she would totally help keep me in line.. hahaha
I really just plan on reminiscing with the folks I care about doing that with. The others? Frankly, can kiss my ass. Yeah, I went there. Oopsie.
No really, I have grown up, moved on. Like I said, A LOT happens in 10 years. So, it'll be fun to see who else has grown up and moved on too.
SONG OF THE DAY: I'm a Bitch by Meredith Brooks (Subaru's theme song)
Friday, July 30, 2010
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Eat, Pray, Love
I love books. Since an very young age I have read.. and read.. and read. At our local library there was a limit to what you could check out EVERY time I went, I got the max. Like I said, I LOVE books.
My top 2 favorites of all time were 1. Gone with the Wind 2. Rebecca but number 2 just got bumped to #3. Eat, Pray, Love has taken the spot.
This book CHANGED my life.
It is about "One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia" but really that doesn't do it justice.. or explain it correctly.
Elizabeth Gilbert poured her heart into these pages and I soaked up every one of them.. at times it felt as if I was the one speaking from them.
She describes her marriage ending, but actually does not give much detail saying that story belongs to the couple. Which, I agree with. So many people have come up to me in the days since my divorce asking "What happened?" or "Why?"
Frankly, I want to know why anyone thinks they are entitled to this knowledge.. some may be asking out of concern, but others were just plain nosey. Those types, disgusted me to the tenth degree.
However, Gilbert does discuss when she realized she wanted out and some of what happened over the course of their separation and ultimate divorce. Although her pain was not mine and no two situations are alike.. I understood.. I felt.. I remembered..I relived..
She falls in love again, which any divorcee will tell you, the idea of that springs forth a hope you honestly didn't even think you had. Her relationship with "David" was so eerily familiar I got spooked for a moment. Because I can admit I found love again, my soulmate actually. But, like the other times I found love.. it did not want me in return. and like Liz mine sparked a move..
So, she starts out on her journey. I hate spoilers and I'm not here to give anything away.
She eats, she prays, and she loves. And, the process in which she goes about it all is so moving, that some of it literally took my breath away.
While I cannot afford the travels she made I felt as though I was along for the ride. while she ate in Italy.. I ate (alot of pasta I might add).
While she prayed in India..I prayed and dove deeper into my relationship with God. Gilbert never gives a specific mention to any one religion just that she is on a spiritual journey. I respected that and felt it was a door opening to my own spirituality.
and the Love.. she loved family and friends and even makes new friends.
All this I find myself doing more and more of...
I'm so grateful for the family I have and all their support. I have even managed to get closer to my sister.
My aunt gave me this little nugget once, "You'll find out who your real friends are once you get a divorce" Boy howdy was she right! I did, and my true friends have been with me through thick and through thin.. and even some old friends I'd lost touch with have become renewed friends.. THEY have ALL been such a blessing!
Then, there are the NEW friends.. I'm enjoying making those..
One in particular: Jen Martin was a woman who really intimidated me my first few months on the job (and if you know Jen you'd know why) However, I always had the utmost respect for her and liked working with her. Then, a simple email really changed how I saw her. It was a note.. not being nosey or too inquistive just a "hope you're doing ok" note and it resonated with me like no body's business. It was truly a sweet sweet gesture. And now I am so very proud to call her my friend!
I ADORE Eat, Pray, Love.. it's something I know I'll reread over and over again.
It may not be for everyone and I get that. but it fell right into my lap when I needed it the most and I'm grateful for it
And, I plan on actually seeing the movie...
So, if you pick up this book in hopes of blazing through it to see how it ends.. don't even bother picking it up. It's not about that.. it is about the journey and each turn of the page. Kind of like life is..
Song of the Day: Secrets and Made for You -One Republic
My top 2 favorites of all time were 1. Gone with the Wind 2. Rebecca but number 2 just got bumped to #3. Eat, Pray, Love has taken the spot.
This book CHANGED my life.
It is about "One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia" but really that doesn't do it justice.. or explain it correctly.
Elizabeth Gilbert poured her heart into these pages and I soaked up every one of them.. at times it felt as if I was the one speaking from them.
She describes her marriage ending, but actually does not give much detail saying that story belongs to the couple. Which, I agree with. So many people have come up to me in the days since my divorce asking "What happened?" or "Why?"
Frankly, I want to know why anyone thinks they are entitled to this knowledge.. some may be asking out of concern, but others were just plain nosey. Those types, disgusted me to the tenth degree.
However, Gilbert does discuss when she realized she wanted out and some of what happened over the course of their separation and ultimate divorce. Although her pain was not mine and no two situations are alike.. I understood.. I felt.. I remembered..I relived..
She falls in love again, which any divorcee will tell you, the idea of that springs forth a hope you honestly didn't even think you had. Her relationship with "David" was so eerily familiar I got spooked for a moment. Because I can admit I found love again, my soulmate actually. But, like the other times I found love.. it did not want me in return. and like Liz mine sparked a move..
So, she starts out on her journey. I hate spoilers and I'm not here to give anything away.
She eats, she prays, and she loves. And, the process in which she goes about it all is so moving, that some of it literally took my breath away.
While I cannot afford the travels she made I felt as though I was along for the ride. while she ate in Italy.. I ate (alot of pasta I might add).
While she prayed in India..I prayed and dove deeper into my relationship with God. Gilbert never gives a specific mention to any one religion just that she is on a spiritual journey. I respected that and felt it was a door opening to my own spirituality.
and the Love.. she loved family and friends and even makes new friends.
All this I find myself doing more and more of...
I'm so grateful for the family I have and all their support. I have even managed to get closer to my sister.
My aunt gave me this little nugget once, "You'll find out who your real friends are once you get a divorce" Boy howdy was she right! I did, and my true friends have been with me through thick and through thin.. and even some old friends I'd lost touch with have become renewed friends.. THEY have ALL been such a blessing!
Then, there are the NEW friends.. I'm enjoying making those..
One in particular: Jen Martin was a woman who really intimidated me my first few months on the job (and if you know Jen you'd know why) However, I always had the utmost respect for her and liked working with her. Then, a simple email really changed how I saw her. It was a note.. not being nosey or too inquistive just a "hope you're doing ok" note and it resonated with me like no body's business. It was truly a sweet sweet gesture. And now I am so very proud to call her my friend!
I ADORE Eat, Pray, Love.. it's something I know I'll reread over and over again.
It may not be for everyone and I get that. but it fell right into my lap when I needed it the most and I'm grateful for it
And, I plan on actually seeing the movie...
So, if you pick up this book in hopes of blazing through it to see how it ends.. don't even bother picking it up. It's not about that.. it is about the journey and each turn of the page. Kind of like life is..
Song of the Day: Secrets and Made for You -One Republic
Monday, July 26, 2010
The Other Side
I have a lot of respect for the variety of people I work with. Everyone does different jobs and because of what we do there's something new almost every single day. That would have to be my favorite part of the job..
Well, today I did someone else's job, so to speak. I stepped in front of the camera. Now, I have done a few interviews and been on camera for other reasons but not like a "reporter" but the Saints were in town and I jumped at the opportunity.
Let me tell you, it's not easy.. even with a fun piece. Some folks (especially little kids) don't want to talk and if they do, one syllable answers are the norm "yes" "no" maybe an "uh-huh"
I had an absolute blast and stepped outside my comfort zone of behind the scenes. I got to see and talk to a lot of nice people, and then there was the ACTUAL Saints Championship Tour, including THE TROPHY!.. all in all I can't complain one bit.
and, when all was said and done.. a few compliments came my way (VERY surprising I might add)
but in the end.. I'll be sticking to my "night" job.
Song of the Day: "Working 9 to 5" -Dolly Parton
Well, today I did someone else's job, so to speak. I stepped in front of the camera. Now, I have done a few interviews and been on camera for other reasons but not like a "reporter" but the Saints were in town and I jumped at the opportunity.
Let me tell you, it's not easy.. even with a fun piece. Some folks (especially little kids) don't want to talk and if they do, one syllable answers are the norm "yes" "no" maybe an "uh-huh"
I had an absolute blast and stepped outside my comfort zone of behind the scenes. I got to see and talk to a lot of nice people, and then there was the ACTUAL Saints Championship Tour, including THE TROPHY!.. all in all I can't complain one bit.
and, when all was said and done.. a few compliments came my way (VERY surprising I might add)
but in the end.. I'll be sticking to my "night" job.
Song of the Day: "Working 9 to 5" -Dolly Parton
Friday, July 23, 2010
Some things just last longer
I have noticed since my rise to singledom that a lot of things last longer than they use to..
Say toothpaste for example, I can now make a tube of toothpaste last months! Other stuff too, like napkins, TP, sweet tea, bottle water, ALCOHOL (hahaha) and FOOD. My grocery shopping has been significantly cut down... well unless the sister comes over.. then my Special K and Doritos disappear faster. (j/k Ray!)
I don't have to worry about someone else eating all my junk food and not telling me or using the last of something and failing to mention it when I head out to the store..
This is me finding the positive in a somewhat dreary situation by the way..
I actually haven't been single since I was 19..so it's been a while.. I did not know how I would react to it when things were leading up to this.. I mean to truly be alone in my own place, responsible for everything(well, that wasn't too new)..it was a big step.
I find some of the things that come with it to be refreshing.. no one hogging the covers..no snoring(that I can hear anyways)..the extra "stuff:..watching what I want to on TV when I want to, etc..
Does this mean I want to stay single forever? Well, no.. I'm just saying I'm in no hurry to share ;)
SONG OF THE DAY: "Undo It" by Carrie Underwood
Say toothpaste for example, I can now make a tube of toothpaste last months! Other stuff too, like napkins, TP, sweet tea, bottle water, ALCOHOL (hahaha) and FOOD. My grocery shopping has been significantly cut down... well unless the sister comes over.. then my Special K and Doritos disappear faster. (j/k Ray!)
I don't have to worry about someone else eating all my junk food and not telling me or using the last of something and failing to mention it when I head out to the store..
This is me finding the positive in a somewhat dreary situation by the way..
I actually haven't been single since I was 19..so it's been a while.. I did not know how I would react to it when things were leading up to this.. I mean to truly be alone in my own place, responsible for everything(well, that wasn't too new)..it was a big step.
I find some of the things that come with it to be refreshing.. no one hogging the covers..no snoring(that I can hear anyways)..the extra "stuff:..watching what I want to on TV when I want to, etc..
Does this mean I want to stay single forever? Well, no.. I'm just saying I'm in no hurry to share ;)
SONG OF THE DAY: "Undo It" by Carrie Underwood
Thursday, July 22, 2010
The Countdown is On!
49 DAYS UNTIL SAINTS HOME OPENER..
I LOVE football. No, love isn't even the right wording for it...I don't even know if there is a word for what I feel during football season. I grew up in a town where it didn't matter if you were winning or losing, TRUE fans stayed until the VERY end. At the age of 2 I announced I wanted to be "a webel" and have been shouting Hotty Toddy ever since. I attended USM and when they are playing in-conference and anyone but Ole Miss I'm rooting for the Golden Eagles. There are even a few other SEC and College teams I'll root for.. like the Gamecocks =)
But, first and foremost, I am a SAINTS fan. and not just a regular one.. if God would allow it.. I'd bleed black and gold.
Nothing beats walking into the Superdome just before a game starts..
IT. IS. ELECTRIC.
Every nerve in my body comes alive and I just want to scream and shout and dance and anything else I can possibly think of to help drive Drew Brees & company into the endzone.
I have been all over that stadium in the nose bleed section, the press box, the media tent, some very good seats and a luxury box...even the locker room. I've even been fortunate enough to step onto the field. (I nearly passed out)
The players are down to earth guys and every one I've met were nice and extremely receptive to the fans. In a day in age when you've got snotty/snobby/rude/etc sports stars this just isn't going on in NOLA..
You can imagine my shock and excitement on Super Bowl Sunday. As a life long Saints fan (and a borderline pessimist) I didn't really think we stood a chance, but I was so happy they'd made it! Then TO WIN IT?! I'm still on a high from it.
Will they repeat? I have faith they can.. now that they have done it. but even if they don't, EVER, I'll know there is black and gold flowing through these veins..
So am I ready for football season? Hell yeah.. Damn Right.. WHO DAT!
SONG OF THE DAY: Halftime by Ying Yang Twins
I LOVE football. No, love isn't even the right wording for it...I don't even know if there is a word for what I feel during football season. I grew up in a town where it didn't matter if you were winning or losing, TRUE fans stayed until the VERY end. At the age of 2 I announced I wanted to be "a webel" and have been shouting Hotty Toddy ever since. I attended USM and when they are playing in-conference and anyone but Ole Miss I'm rooting for the Golden Eagles. There are even a few other SEC and College teams I'll root for.. like the Gamecocks =)
But, first and foremost, I am a SAINTS fan. and not just a regular one.. if God would allow it.. I'd bleed black and gold.
Nothing beats walking into the Superdome just before a game starts..
IT. IS. ELECTRIC.
Every nerve in my body comes alive and I just want to scream and shout and dance and anything else I can possibly think of to help drive Drew Brees & company into the endzone.
I have been all over that stadium in the nose bleed section, the press box, the media tent, some very good seats and a luxury box...even the locker room. I've even been fortunate enough to step onto the field. (I nearly passed out)
The players are down to earth guys and every one I've met were nice and extremely receptive to the fans. In a day in age when you've got snotty/snobby/rude/etc sports stars this just isn't going on in NOLA..
You can imagine my shock and excitement on Super Bowl Sunday. As a life long Saints fan (and a borderline pessimist) I didn't really think we stood a chance, but I was so happy they'd made it! Then TO WIN IT?! I'm still on a high from it.
Will they repeat? I have faith they can.. now that they have done it. but even if they don't, EVER, I'll know there is black and gold flowing through these veins..
So am I ready for football season? Hell yeah.. Damn Right.. WHO DAT!
SONG OF THE DAY: Halftime by Ying Yang Twins
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Goals
Some know.. Some don’t..I’ve been through a fairly bumpy roller coaster ride over the past three years.. Frankly, since about 2001..but A LOT has happened in just the last 3 years..
Due to this “ride” I’m setting some goals for myself as I now move up and onward. There are a variety of them but 3 main ones to co-inside with the 3 years and my love of odd numbers =)
1. Learn
From mistakes..because frankly I believe that is why we make them as human beings to learn from them.
From the nonmistakes..because not everything I do is a mistake. I’ve done some good things in this ol’life of mine and I can learn from those as well
And Just learning.. I crave knowledge and I love it. I believe you never stop growing so you can really never stop learning..it makes you better.
2. Heal
The woman who wrote one of my most favorite books in the world is Margaret Mitchell. She once said, “I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken - and I'd rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived.”
So when I say heal.. I don’t actually mean picking up pieces and gluing them back together or getting over something or someone. Healing goes hand in hand with learning.. The scars from life are what make us stronger, build character, get us to where we are going. I own my scars, no one can take them away from me. But scars, imply healing.. there was a wound there but it has gotten better.. what’s left is there to remind you of what happened.
3. Rebuild
This one should take the rest of my life.. and I am perfectly ok with this. Every day is a building block, and while we are not guaranteed a tomorrow, if and when I get mine I plan on doing what I can with it. So, rebuilding..my relationship with God, my family, my friends.. that’s the plan..
Due to this “ride” I’m setting some goals for myself as I now move up and onward. There are a variety of them but 3 main ones to co-inside with the 3 years and my love of odd numbers =)
1. Learn
From mistakes..because frankly I believe that is why we make them as human beings to learn from them.
From the nonmistakes..because not everything I do is a mistake. I’ve done some good things in this ol’life of mine and I can learn from those as well
And Just learning.. I crave knowledge and I love it. I believe you never stop growing so you can really never stop learning..it makes you better.
2. Heal
The woman who wrote one of my most favorite books in the world is Margaret Mitchell. She once said, “I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken - and I'd rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived.”
So when I say heal.. I don’t actually mean picking up pieces and gluing them back together or getting over something or someone. Healing goes hand in hand with learning.. The scars from life are what make us stronger, build character, get us to where we are going. I own my scars, no one can take them away from me. But scars, imply healing.. there was a wound there but it has gotten better.. what’s left is there to remind you of what happened.
3. Rebuild
This one should take the rest of my life.. and I am perfectly ok with this. Every day is a building block, and while we are not guaranteed a tomorrow, if and when I get mine I plan on doing what I can with it. So, rebuilding..my relationship with God, my family, my friends.. that’s the plan..
What do you want to know?
I am starting this blog as sort of an exercise in therapeutic journal writing via the internet. I suspect almost no one will read this.. but frankly I'm not doing it for anyone but myself.
I'm going to be writing on a variety of topics almost nothing will be off limits here..so consider yourself warned-ish.
I cannot take credit for this, I swiped it from someone else. but it got me thinking...so it also got me writing.
I'm sure there are many more...but here's a few responses...
I want to know if I am doing what I am suppose to.
I want to know why things seem to happen to ME.
I want to know whether I will be happy or some version of it.
I want to know if certain things will ever stop haunting me.
I want to know if there will be a day soon when I don't cry.
I want to know why lying to me has become more normal than not lying to me.
I want to know what my boss really thinks about me.
I want to know why we are like we are.
I want to know if someone will ever look at me like Noah looks at Ali in The Notebook or Rhett looks at Scarlett before he told her he didn't give a damn.
I want to know why I'm so girly.
I want to know why anyone would think it’s ok to physically, mentally, or emotionally hurt someone you say you “love”
I want to know if I will love someone that actually loves me back.
I want to know if I am going to catch a break soon, or if you ever really do.
I want to know what my friends really think of me...I think.
I want to know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop without having to put the work into it.
I want to know what it’s like to be loved the way that I have loved.
I want to know if it was worth it.
I want to know why they thought College Algebra was so important..I haven’t used a bit of it.
I want to know there aren’t more bars in Jackson w/ karaoke on the weekends
I want to know why bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people.
I want to know why “if it’s not one thing, it’s your mother”
I want to know why anyone would ever hurt a child.
I want to know what happened to all the characters on Friends..They need a “Where are they now?” episode.
I want to know who put the bop in the bop-she-bop-she-bop?
SONG OF THE DAY: "Respect"
I'm going to be writing on a variety of topics almost nothing will be off limits here..so consider yourself warned-ish.
I cannot take credit for this, I swiped it from someone else. but it got me thinking...so it also got me writing.
I'm sure there are many more...but here's a few responses...
I want to know if I am doing what I am suppose to.
I want to know why things seem to happen to ME.
I want to know whether I will be happy or some version of it.
I want to know if certain things will ever stop haunting me.
I want to know if there will be a day soon when I don't cry.
I want to know why lying to me has become more normal than not lying to me.
I want to know what my boss really thinks about me.
I want to know why we are like we are.
I want to know if someone will ever look at me like Noah looks at Ali in The Notebook or Rhett looks at Scarlett before he told her he didn't give a damn.
I want to know why I'm so girly.
I want to know why anyone would think it’s ok to physically, mentally, or emotionally hurt someone you say you “love”
I want to know if I will love someone that actually loves me back.
I want to know if I am going to catch a break soon, or if you ever really do.
I want to know what my friends really think of me...I think.
I want to know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop without having to put the work into it.
I want to know what it’s like to be loved the way that I have loved.
I want to know if it was worth it.
I want to know why they thought College Algebra was so important..I haven’t used a bit of it.
I want to know there aren’t more bars in Jackson w/ karaoke on the weekends
I want to know why bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people.
I want to know why “if it’s not one thing, it’s your mother”
I want to know why anyone would ever hurt a child.
I want to know what happened to all the characters on Friends..They need a “Where are they now?” episode.
I want to know who put the bop in the bop-she-bop-she-bop?
SONG OF THE DAY: "Respect"
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